You might expect the occasional “order” or “command” from your boss. But it’s a whole other thing when it’s your peer who’s doing the bossing around, isn’t?
Skye Schooley, a writer for Business New Daily explains, “A bossy co-worker is generally someone who dictates the room, whether intentionally or unintentionally, and shares their opinion as fact.”
“Their behavior may consist of telling you what to do, critiquing you on how to do your job or even monopolising brainstorm sessions. Dealing with a bossy co-worker is frustrating and sometimes impedes productivity.”
If so, rest assured, there are ways you can handle it. I had the chance to weigh in with Schooley to share my own advice on dealing with this kind of colleague.
Don’t go it alone.
Decide with your manager on what tasks are superfluous to your role and worthy of passing on. Then contract verbally with your manager that they’ll back you up and provide cover if and when you say “No” to a task.
If your boss endorses the boundary you’ve created, you have a much better chance of overcoming pushback from your colleague.
Don’t come across as completely uncooperative or unwilling to pitch in. Neither of these builds your reputation for results. When you offer a “no” to a low-prestige task like taking the meeting minutes, come back with a give – a “yes” – to a higher-caliber one that would give your team an edge, like performing a competitor analysis.
Have a few friendly but firm retorts ready for a bossy colleague.
Instead of “That’s not my job,” you can come back with “That’s an interesting project. I’m not sure it’s realistic with my workload though,” “Let me steer you to someone who knows more about that” or “Hmmm, let me talk to [my manager] about it.”
At a minimum, train yourself to buy more time and not to give a “yes” in the moment.
About the Author
Selena Rezvani is a recognised consultant, speaker and author on women and leadership. She is the author of two leadership books targeted at professional women – Pushback: How Smart Women Ask—and Stand Up—for What They Want and The Next Generation of Women Leaders. Selena has been featured in the LA Times, Oprah.com, Todayshow.com, Forbes, and wrote an award-winning column on women for The Washington Post.
The article above was originally published on Selena’s website, BeLeaderly and is re-published here with kind permission by Selena.